Happy second year of the decade, which is easy to type, but precedes ... 2012

By John Toth

Here it is, 2011, and what a relief. It’s much better than 2010 and 2009 when it comes to typing the numbers on a regular keyboard. Good times for writers are ahead.

Just ease those left-hand fingers on the 2 and with a right hand finger tap the 0, then the 1 twice with the left hand, and that’s it. Easy as can be. So much faster than 2010 or 2009.

How many of you know what to call the first decade of this century, 2000-2009? I had to do a little research. In the past, it would require visiting the library and searching the index cards and data banks for the answer. Now, I just google it (used as a verb). The answers pop right up.

I wanted to call that first decade the “preteens,” but that’s not what it’s called. Preteens would be appropriate, but those who know better than me have come up with another name. The “noughties.”

Noughties won the name race for the first decade name, with the “aughts” a distant second. Another candidate, “00”, didn’t get too far. It was just too boring to refer to a decade as two zeros.

But, why worry about stuff like this? It’s all in the past. We don’t have to struggle with this problem again until 2100 … well, you and I won’t have to worry about it, anyway. Our grand children may be faced with finding a name for that decade, so you may want to laminate this article and put it in a safe place to save them a little time a hundred years down the road.

We’re now in the teens, a well accepted terminology and not as awkward. And, 2011 has a nice ring to it. I’m really looking forward to 11/11/11, although we get pretty close to this on 1/11/11, the Bulletin’s next issue date.

What a difference 100 years make. I wonder what it will be like in 2111, based on the technological leap we experienced between 1911 and today?

In 1911, Chevrolet was getting ready to manufacture a car to compete against Ford’s Model T (It comes in all colors, as long as you like black). Eugene Ely landed on the deck of the USS Pennsylvania anchored in San Francisco Bay, marking the first time an aircraft landed on a ship. Radio was in its infancy. Thomas Edison’s first success with talking movies was still two years off.

Apply how far we have come and let your imagination take you 100 years in the future. What will it be like for our grandchildren or great grandchildren? I could make some stuff up about hover crafts and all that, but it’s best to leave it to your imagination.

So, let’s enjoy the second year of our teens decade. After all, 2012 is right around the corner. I saw the movie. Rich people will buy tickets to board Chinese-built arks and survive. The rest of us will just fall in the cracks or slide in the water, along with our cities.
Not true. Don’t be fooled by an expensive movie. I didn’t even think it was that good. Why did I get on this subject? I wanted to finish on a happy note. O.K. Let’s try it again.

So, let’s enjoy the second year of our teens decade. Don’t worry about 2012. Whatever you may have heard about those Mayans, who had no idea how to plan a calendar, so they made it up ... is not true. Nothing will happen. I’ll be doing the paper and writing columns ... from my underground bunker. Just kidding.

There, that’s a happier ending. See you next week when I’ll try to make you feel better by writing a column on frying pan collections. This Mayan stuff is too depressing.