Reading glasses help my find the button on the selfie stick

By John Toth / Editor and Publisher

Sometimes I even amaze myself of how ahead of the pack I am. Yes, I am patting myself on the back because I tend to luck into some stories that then become major items on the national scale.

Take selfie sticks, for example. I wrote about them last week, and a week later, they are part of Saturday Night Live’s 40th anniversary show.

It must be because I can see words clearly now through these reading glasses. I can actually read just like before, except I have to wear these things.

I went to the eye doctor a while back, and he went through all the routine tests, like three years before. (I know that I should be getting them checked annually.)

Your vision is fine, he said. But you are getting old, and you need reading glasses. It happens to all old people sooner or later. He was trying to be funny, but I took it as an observation he should have kept to himself.

He wrote me a prescription for reading glasses. I went to fill it, and it was a lot more than what I wanted to pay. You have to be kidding me. I can buy these things at the dollar store.

They are not the same, the clerk said. Of course they are not One is expensive, and the other costs $1.

Just kidding. I did get some decently priced glasses that don’t make me look like a dork, and I can see the printed word now just fine.

The selfie stick thing was just a coincidence. I’m not going to pull a Brian Williams on you.

I’ve had to use reading glasses for a while. It was a big shock to me when I finally went for an eye exam because I was getting headaches. I thought for a long time that I was indestructible. Age changes that.

Just to make sure I have no trouble reading, I bought a bunch of glasses and placed them at strategic locations, like the bedroom, cars, office.

The office is the central headquarters. That’s where all the glasses are located that are not being used at the moment. Over time, though, there are a bunch of dogs in there that I would never wear in public.

Those are the ones I bought at the dollar store. The quality is not all that good. Sometimes the lens is even wavy, and make the words move around a little.

Those glasses are collecting dust. You get what you pay for.

I bought a couple of pairs the other day, and when I came home, they fell apart at the touch. That was disappointing, and they cost more than $1.

You can’t buy anything decent anymore made in China.

Using these glasses also lets me work the Bluetooth remote on my selfie stick. Once I get hold of it, I take my glasses off, push the button and smile.

And, I also will be able to enjoy the new book I just ordered. It’s a a classic written by a Hungarian author, translated into English in 1987, purchased on Amazon, and being shipped from England.

Yes, we live in a complicated, but wonderful world, dear reader. Now it’s time to take a selfie, but I can’t find the button. Wait, where are those glasses? Somebody must have moved them.