What’s with all this violence at fast food restraurants?

By John Toth / Bulletin Publisher

There is something going on in this country that we have to correct, or a lot more people will get hurt – violence in fast food restaurants by hungry, temperamental people.

I decided to shed light on this problem after reading that a guy in Albany, N.Y., actually fire-bombed a Taco Bell because he didn’t feel like they put enough meat in his XL Chalupas. Must be an anomaly, right? Wrong. Read on.

After ordering the meal from the drive-through, the man called and accused the restaurant of skimping on the meat. Then he said that he may just “redecorate” the place. Later that night, someone threw a Molotov cocktail that burned the area under the drive-through.

This guy apparently felt like he had to make a statement.

And, when you’re in a pancake house, be careful whom you ask for the syrup.

When one diner in Massachusetts asked another diner to pass her the syrup, she was attacked, and a fight broke out. I would have just passed the syrup, but that would make too much sense. It would be a lot less messy.

And, there is the woman in Ohio, who was told at a McDonalds that she could not be served chicken nuggets in the morning because it’s not on the breakfast menu.

She reached through the window, grabbed the clerk and began assaulting her. The clerk fought back as much as possible, mostly trying to stay away. When the woman could not reach the clerk, she smashed the drive-through window and left. Police found her. She served 60 days in jail.

Note to McDonalds: Keep some nuggets on hand at all hours just in case some crazy person won’t take no for an answer.

And, keep plenty of mustard and mayonnaise on hand.

Two women in South Florida were charged with assault with a deadly weapon after they chased a Wendy’s employee and threatened her with a pink stun gun because they didn’t get mustard and mayonnaise packets with their order.

At least they used a pink stun gun.

If the line is too long, wait patiently. Don’t do what a man did when he thought that McDonalds took too long with his filet-of-fish sandwich at the drive-through window.

He climbed through the window and beat up the clerk. Then he took his sandwich and drove off.

Here is a word of advice in case this man is reading my column (which is highly unlikely): Check your blood sugar level. You may have a mild form of hypoglycemia. Or, you may be just a temperamental bully, who knows?

At least he didn’t attack the cash registers, like the woman in Kansas, who didn’t like her burger. She asked for a refund and was refused. Instead, she was offered another burger.

She then proceeded to throw a bucket of water over the counter and beat up three cash registers. Maybe that made her feel better.

And, if you go nuts in a fast food joint, don’t get caught and have your car searched, like a couple who took offense when a restaurant forgot to give them an order of French fries and straws. The guy flashed a .38-caliber pistol at the clerk, and the couple drove off with the corrected order, until police stopped the car.

That was the end of their meth lab operation. Police found enough evidence in the car to search the house.

Attention meth lab owners: Don’t worry about the fries, and drink from the cup.

I could go on, but it’s getting late, and I feel very hungry and irritated. Where is that order? I’ve been waiting for at least three minutes. Be right back...